The One Thing That Changed My Life This Decade

A decade has passed, and A LOT has changed. The biggest thing that has shifted is my relationship to myself. I started off the decade feeling so incredibly disconnected from everything in every way possible.

I tried every single fad to try and go deeper into life and actually feel like I’m living it instead of watching it go by, and honestly, nothing really worked for me.

So tell me if this sounds familiar:

You go to yoga. Or you listen to an astrology podcast. Or you try and meditate in silence. But you just can’t seem to fully drop in. Your mind is on other stuff, you’re counting down the moments you can leave, or you’re scrolling on your phone, or your thoughts drift to some far out fantasy. 

Or you have a birthday party and everything is for you, everyone is gathered for you — the candles, the party, the excitement! But then you feel like you are watching it instead of living it. You can’t fully receive it. It feels fine, but not great. 

The holidays came and went, and it yes, there were good times, but it didn’t feel like it was what it *should* be. You couldn’t help but feel like something was missing. 

And most importantly, in your day to day, you wake up, get through your day, and when you lay your head down at night again you’re not even sure what fully happened. 

It’s almost like you’re living your life on autopilot. 

So what do you do?

Buy a ton of crystals to try and connect? Half listen to another spiritual podcast? Get another reading? Go to another yoga class? Shame yourself harder for not being able to sit still for a half hour? 

I hear you. So hard. I so. Freakin’. Get. It. And I’m here to tell you that life doesn’t have to be this way. There is actually a way to live life so deeply connected and wildly pleasurable and in tune, living with all of your heart and soul. 

And there is ONE way that has radically changed my life, and millions of other people’s as well. 

RITUAL. 

It is too easy to live life on autopilot. In fact, in our culture, it’s normally celebrated! From stuffing our noses in our phones, or at work, or in dramatic relationships, or in reality TV (and not bashing any of these things, they all can be beautiful when balanced ;) ) 

Here’s the thing — you don’t have to buy seven chickens and an amethyst crystal and rise at the asscrack of dawn to have a powerful and potent ritual. 

Ritual can be infused in our daily lives, living exactly the way we do now, just more intentionally. 

This year, my challenge for you is to turn what you are doing into a ritual — from cooking to cleaning your floors after company, to grocery shopping in the freezer section, to your morning commute stuck in traffic, to going to the club with your best friends, to taking a shower, to brushing your hair, to conversations with your friends, to your morning cup of joe. 

This life is MAGICAL. Every moment we live on this planet is a sacred, truly precious experience. We have the power to make everything mind-blowingly potent because we humans are truly powerful creatures. 

Here’s the thing. We are in constant co-creation with everything in life. Our ancestors saw raw crops, and they made a cooked meal out of it. We saw some strings and wood and we made music from it. We transform little gifts that the divine throws at us and we make something fucking amazing from it. And we can do that every second of every single day, if we set our minds to it. 

I have so many people asking me for specific rituals, or how to pray “correctly”, or how to manifest. I say, you are already doing it! We are already in communion because we exist on this earth, we are already praying because we are speaking and thinking, we are already doing rituals because we move throughout our day. 

I say take what you are already doing, and make it sacred. So all of a sudden, when you are pouring your morning cup of coffee, you pour a little bit out on the ground outside for the land spirits. Or when you are stirring your veggie stew with cashew cream, you are speaking prayers and stirring clockwise to unlock even more nutrients and supercharge your food, when you clean your floors, you are spiritually cleansing and grounding the energy of your home, when you shower, you imagine all the energy of the day going down the drain. 

There is nothing more you have to do or not do to cultivate your magic. You are the magic. And setting it out means to just turn your attention to the fact that you have incredible power, and the most mundane of chores can become our daily devotions to spirit and to ourselves. 

Tending to our bodies, our homes, our loved ones, our craft, our creativity, our desires, our passions, our work are all a part of this sacred dance. So many people think we have to reject all these things to become a truly “spiritual being” — I say that whatever created us knew exactly what they were fucking doing when they put us in these skin suits, and there is no sense wasting this life and all of the magical gifts that the daily whirlwind gifts us trying to not be a human living in this world when we are one. 

So rather than always trying to go up and out of your body, try expanding within your own bones. Try finding the divinity in each day. The ritual of life itself. The magic in the mundane. And watch how quickly you come ALIVE.